I feel it again.
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Well, it's more like I feel it starting to lure me, suck me in again. I'm slowly sliding into it but I think I still have twigs left to hold on to. And I have to fight it this time, if I want 2018 to be better than every miserable year I've struggled through. I have to be better. Do better.
My mom thinks I hate my job because it pays low. Well, she's not entirely wrong but the blame is on me. I love my job so much I stay even when the pay is low. I believe in this industry. I just need to get out there. I need to be on a roll again. I need to believe in myself more than I ever have. Where to get consistency?
Ambient noise is the only embrace I've been getting these past years.
I think I'd like to date myself on my birthday. Hmm. Maybe I'll go get checked @ that psych facility in QC. Then maybe go watch a movie @ Ayala 30th (free tix c/o August!).
I'm at peace. These past days I've been dreaming of dead friends and honeymoon villas and flying. I'd love to talk, I have senseless things to say, words helplessly hanging on the tip of my wasabi prickled tongue, but I wipe them off with my sundae-stained napkin instead. No one wants to hear but myself.
